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A gift of life: Siblings celebrate special bond

By DIANE TURBYFILL, LTN Staff Writer

Jan. 25, 2002 - With gifts, cards and flowers Micky Cook and Deb Harkey celebrated their 20th anniversary last month.

The brother and sister mark Dec. 9th on their calendars each year, a reminder of the day in 1982 when Harkey gave an amazing gift to Cook — a kidney.

“Debby gave me back my life,” Cook says.

But Harkey sees the date of her donation as the day when her own life also began.

Twenty-years ago Deb Harkey was a 22-year-old high school drop-out. Donating a kidney to her brother, she says, gave her a new outlook on life.

Following the surgery, the young woman went back to school, eventually earning a master’s degree. Today she is a teacher at West Lincoln Middle School. Undergoing surgery, she says, had made her virtually fearless.

“It makes you not afraid of things anymore. And look how rich our lives are now.”

The kidney donation was just the start for Deb Harkey: she is on the bone marrow donors list, gives blood whenever she can and hopes to inspire others to do the same.

“If people had ever experienced things like we did in our family, they’d do it.”

The roots of Micky Cook’s and Deb Harkey’s story are found in the their west Lincoln childhood.

Since the age of three, Cook had suffered from kidney disease, causing his organs to deteriorate. The little boy spent his childhood in and out of doctors’ offices and hospitals.

But his sister planned to change her brother’s life, right from the start.

“There was never a question for me to do it,” Deb Harkey says. “From when I was small, I told my mom I would give him a kidney.”

Cook’s five brothers and sisters were tested to see if they could donate a kidney to him. Harkey came up a match.

For two months leading up to the surgery, Harkey went to the hospital to give blood. The blood was then injected into her brother, in hopes of preventing his body from rejecting the kidney.

Both of Cook’s kidneys were removed in October, before the transplant. Due to an infection, he had become very ill, weighing a mere 96 lbs.

“I was so sick. I had to get my health back before we could have surgery,” he recalls.

When he was well enough, Micky Cook, then 24, was joined by his sister at Charlotte Memorial Hospital for the day that would alter their lives.

Harkey’s husband, Ernie, was behind her all the way.

“We knew the risk, but it was worth it,” she says.

And Cook’s wife, Mary, was simply grateful.

“She gave life not just to Micky but to all of us.”

Harkey was in and out of the hospital in 11 days.

“(The kidney) rejected about three days after the surgery but then it was all right,” Cook says.

Cook was released from the hospital after 34 days.

Charlotte Memorial may have been glad to see them go: reliving their high-spirited high school days, the brother/sister duo admit to being a handful. hospital.

“We were a terror when we were in high school together,” Deb Harkey says.

The two re-lived their teen days while in the hospital.

“They lost him one time because he was on another floor with me,” she says.

Cook also remembers sneaking off during his stay to have a meal in a nearby restaurant.

“We’ve both always believed that you should live life to the fullest, but it gets you in trouble some times,” Harkey says.

When Cook wasn’t dining out or visiting his sister, he was sending her notes and cards, thanking her for what she had done.

“Anybody who would do that has to have a special place in heaven,” says Cook. “Debby truly put her life on the line for me, and my scar reminds me of that every day.”

Following the surgery, Micky Harkey had to re-learn how to live.

“It was an adjustment,” he says. “If you’re sick for so long, you have to figure out what to do.”

Cook decided to work. For the first time in his life he was able to work 40-hour weeks.

He has not spent much time at the doctor since the transplant — until recently. In May of last year Cook suffered a heart attack.

“They’re telling me now that I’ve got a heart disease, and I’ve got to have a heart transplant.”

His heart is currently working at 30 percent.

Cook is grateful for the 20 years his kidney transplant has added to his life and feels optimistic that he will overcome heart disease.

“I’m going to beat this heart thing,” he says.

“You can have mine,” Harkey tells him, laughing, “but I’m not planning on going anywhere anytime soon.”

© 2001 Lincoln Times-News  

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